Posts

Showing posts from October, 2020

Am I scared .....

 Its 1:30 AM and I have somehow managed to calm it down but it really is not the way. Am I scared? Scared to be in a new relationship. To be with someone again. To love someone the way I did in the past by literally dancing each day as it going to be no tomorrow.   I really don't know if I am scared. But am I worried! Maybe I am. I am a little worried that my own self will jeopardize this new seed I have sown even before it has become into a small little plant. Growing it into a giant tree who will give me lifelong of riped fruit will be nothing but just a distant dream. I am worried about that.  I lost myself earlier because I loved someone more than myself and today when I learned to love myself back, I just completely forgot the balance in a relationship which needs to be maintained. I know her likes, I know her dislikes but still, somehow I say it and realise in that swift second back that I have made a mistake but the point is, what you have said, it cannot be taken back.  I r

Rage

Image
  Just another angry rant to release my anger. Written in Oct2019. This all actually came true on 1st Nov. approx. time was 10:40AM.  One of the biggest mistakes I made was to believe that I will fill the void she has from her past relationships and Childhood. Some people just fear when they see too much love around and just can't accept that it's all true.  This is also the time when I was diagnosed with "situational depression". The term I had never heard before. It took months of self-healing and sessions before I became normal. From Aug2019-Nov2019, I went through several therapy sessions to move from it. I can never forget the amazing people who helped me understand the situation and the person I was dealing with. They made me even better than I was before I met her. It was only through this, I could open to my parents and people around me to talk and find a way to end it. Toxic people have toxicity all around them. Them having similar friends, similar parents is

Love you More than my Hometown

Image
First attempt at writing a song . Its a message to the girl who /if will come next .    The way you have a best friend, I want us to be, Our families will be routing for us like we are a home team  Most likely to say, "yes" and settle down.  Listen and don't frown. Make a Family and grow some Plants around  But we can't stop hearing all those strange world sounds And livin' our real lives is what we are really bound.  This will sound fair I know that you are scared and nervous for all people and lights I don't blame you for your immediate stress up and literally loss of sight At the same time your bags are packed up and you are ready to go  But I just need  you to know  I promise to love you more than I do my Favorite Football Club, Love you more than the chilled beer at the pub, Love you more than any other thing I have it around.  How does that sound ? Will Love you more than I do to my bed or Mark Walberg does to TED  More than you love Beer when you aren&#

Dreamin' - New Love

Image
 You can call , you can call on me, You can fall, you can fall on me,  A little bit annoying but make everything going, It's just the way I am and I am what I am doing.  Thirty Four, spinning all through town. Sometimes windows up, sometimes down. It is a sure fun ride with me on your right, Not worried about nothin' nor worried about daylight  Soon we will hit the Hills,  The drive will be an absolute Thrill  And you look great in your dress of frills The long days and long nights, we will sit by and watch fireflies, Music playlist playin' through Bluetooth  And stars above as our roof I can pretty much get used to this  Dreamin each day of nothin' and soaking up the summer  Only & Only if you are Up for it from Moonlight to Sunshine 

Fraud, Liar , Cheater

Image
  Would you care if we quit talking? Would you care if I went walking? I need to know how you feel So I know how to deal. I like it when you're by my side. I hate it when you try to hide All the cheating and the lies Bring me one step closer to saying goodbye. I know fraud is a fact because I've caught you and family in the act. I wish did not have trust in you, but it's kinda hard when I busted you. Seems to me you wouldn't care even if I weren't there. I always wonder who you're with, maybe friends or searching for another dick. I'm not saying I don't believe you. Too many people have told me to leave you, but you were everything to me, which is why I always wanted us to be. Believing you may be a mistake, but it's a risk I was willing to take. You lied from 1st day to the last, I got to know 4 days into marriage but I did not cast. I gave all I could but you were the one who was stuck in the past Never let the air come and help our relationship ma

Thinking

Image
  I have been thinking  about this lately Old Memories drive me crazy How Morning Kiss and Hug kept me going all-day Working great and Making Hay  Wishing you were here to stay  Smiling having your LIT each day  How we did what we did and looked Cool  People thought we are doing it just right Nobody knew how each day we did internal fight This would lead to something big I had an insight But I was pretty much unaware of your might Knowing and still being played  You Tried to made me leave but I stayed  The times were hard , making me crazy But I dint wanted to give-up on us baby  But each day you were enjoying and I was barely breathing Praying to someone I never did before  Your good days were my worst  I stayed awake and you had no trouble sleeping  Things happen for a reason I told myself Don't devote to someone unless you love yourself They say they Love you but move out Lie , cheat and eventually knock you down .  I am happy it ended and ended quickly  Suffering was too much a

Difficult People

Image
Team play has come a long way and is here to stay. The management gurus all over the world would have you forever pretense that getting along with your colleagues and bosses runs in your blood. But let's be honest honey, how congenial can you be with everyone around at the workplace? There tend to be those whom you find difficult, and where despite your best intentions, you simply can't get along. Your problem could be a client frequently using foul language, a constantly monitoring boss, a lazy team-member, or even an accurately depressed coworker. So, how do you tackle the difficulty?  Step One, Change your perception. Don't call these people difficult, call them a challenge; your grave situation will suddenly become invigorating. You tune your mind positively and find a solution.   Now, prepare to listen to your challenges. Seek to understand their personality traits like why they want to work to be done in a particular manner, how they visualize a project etc. If you tr